My son came home from school one day,
with a silly grin on his face,
He thought he was smarter than me,
his mom,
and
he could put me in my place.
HE SAID:
Guess what I learned in Civics Two,
that's taught by Mr. Wright,
It's about the laws of the land,
today,
it's called
THE CHILDREN'S BILL OF RIGHTS.
IT SAYS:
That I don't have to clean my room,
I don't even have to cut my hair,
Nobody can tell me what I can eat,
or choose the clothes I wear.
IT SAID:
Freedom of speech
is my constitutional
guarantee,
and it's my choice
of what I
read,
or what I watch on T.V.
I have the
freedom of religion,
and regardless to what you
say,
I don't have to ask your God for help
I
don't even have to pray.
IT SAID:
I can wear an earring in my ear,
and if I want to
I can pierce my nose,
It's my choice if I so desire,
to tattoo Satan's numbers
across my toes.
Hey,
if ever again you try to spank me,
I will
charge you
with the crime,
and I can back up
all my charges,
With the marks on my behind.
HE SAID, NOW:
Don't ever touch my body again,
this body of mine is for me to use,
And not for your hugs
and kisses and stuff,
that's just another form
of child abuse.
HE CONTINUED WITH:
And stop trying to fill my head
with morals,
like your mama did to you,
Things like that is called
mind control,
And
that's illegal too!
Mom,
I have these children's rights,
you can't do a thing to me,
I can call the children's services,
better known as C. S. D.
MY TURN!!!!
My very first impression was,
to toss this boy right out the door,
But here was a chance
to teach him a lesson,
for once and for ever more.
I took my time
and mulled it over,
but something like this
I couldn't let go,
This
kid of mine didn't realize,
that he was messing with
a pro!
AND AWAY WE GO!
The next day we went shopping,
very much to his dismay,
I didn't buy him 501s
or shirts designed by Nike.
I had called and talked to the C. S. D.,
they said
that they didn't really care,
If I bought him Volume shoes,
or a pair of Nike Airs.
AND THEN:
I cancelled his appointment with DMV,
so he could test his driving SKILLS,
I'd probably be dead by now for sure,
If only looks could kill!
I SAID:
By-the-way,
I don't have time to stop and eat,
or pick up stuff for you to munch,
I think you should follow
C. S. D.'s advice,
And make yourself
a big sack lunch.
So, you say what?
that you're not hungry,
that
you can wait
til dinner time?
Well,
I am fixing liver and onions,
Cause that's a favorite
dish of mine.
Can we stop to get a movie,
so you can watch on the VCR?
Gosh no!
I sold what was your T.V.,
And bought four new tires
for my car.
I also rented out your room,
sorry,
you really don't need a bed,
All I really have to do for you,
Is put a roof over your head.
As long as I have
to buy your clothes,
and the
food
that you must eat,
The money I gave you
for an allowance,
Is going to buy me
something neat.
No more eating after we shop,
no more joking along the way,
Son,
I too have a
BILL OF RIGHTS,
That goes into effect today.
What's the matter,
why are you crying?
What are
you doing
down on your knees?
Why are you asking
God to help you,
Instead of the C. S. D.?